To be continued...

I injured myself (tore a calf muscle) and my doctor doesn't want me on the ice for at least six weeks so that means no ballet either. I'm bummed since I just started this ballet journey and kind of felt like I was starting to get the hang of everything. Once I'm better, I'll update again. It will probably be close to the end of the year.

Cry for me :(

Another skater joins the ranks!

It's been a few weeks since I've updated my blog. There really weren't any new developments in terms of progress so I didn't have any updates for the blog. I'm still plugging away at everything, though! We had a new student joining us this evening and she mentioned she was a figure skater (Yay! My people!). I got to talk to her a bit once class was over and it was nice to be able to "talk shop" with another skater.

It was really a lot of the same this week except we ran out of time and didn't get to do anything across the floor but we did some center work. My pliés are getting better but they are still not as bendy as they should be. I'm just thankful that Bobbie knows why and that it's going to take a while before my ankle gives enough to allow me to bend that way. My flexibility has improved slightly overall so when we do splits I can feel myself getting lower and lower each week. In fact, Bobbie showed us a neat little trick to prevent hamstring injuries while learning splits. You squat down with your legs together and get into a ball with your nose touching the tiny space between your knees. Then, with one leg completely still, move the other to the back sloooowly until the stationary leg can't stay still anymore and needs to move forward. I'm sure I didn't explain that well. It's easier to show someone. But with this, I was able to get farther down in my split and it didn't strain my hammies as much. Neat!

I'll be back next week for some fresh new torture. The biggest issue with these classes are the earworms I take home with me. That piano music is catchy.

Just keep swimming!

There were no classes last week because the studio takes a week off from classes to prepare for the new Academic Year (which starts today!). So, I haven't really been ballet-ing last week and have been focusing instead on skating my Bronze Free Skate Test (which I passed, but barely). The new academic year comes with a new start time for the class. Instead of a 7:00pm start, we now start at 7:15pm. Not much of a difference but it allows me a bit more time to get down to Littleton from Longmont in afternoon rush hour traffic. There were a couple of new students this week, an older lady and a younger miss who looked to be in her 20s. The younger of the two mentioned she was new to ballet but when we started at the barre it became clear that she knew more than she was letting on and the older lady was dancing as though she's been doing this her whole life (which she probably has). I'm really sick of being the only "absolutely new to ballet" student in the class. I feel like I'm holding everyone back.

Barrez - My lack of practice during the past week reared its ugly head at the barre this evening. I started off okay but got lost a couple of times and Bobbie gave me a "look."

Centerz - My glissades were meh because my plié wasn't very strong prior to the glissade. Again, I was out of sorts. But, my pirouettes were slightly better. Bobbie told me not to wrap my passé in the pirouette because it could lead to a wrap when I do my jumps in skating and she doesn't want my ballet training to have a negative effect on my skate technique. Very thoughtful of her! So, she's okay with me doing my passé to the side rather than having my foot in front of my knee as I should for proper ballet technique.

Across the Floorz - We did the same combo that we've been working on: waltz-balancé-pas de bourreé-pirouette and, once I got the pas de bourreé sussed out with the correct foot placement, I did okay on this.

So yeah, I'm still the beginneriest beginner in the class even though we have some new students but I'm trying my best to keep up. Since starting ballet I have seen some noticeable changes in my physique! I have not one but TWO abs developing and my pants are fitting a bit looser. Not that I was fat to begin with but I can tell I'm becoming a bit more lean. When I put my free skate dress on for my test this past Friday, I noticed it was slightly loose around the bust. One month of ballet has done more for me physically than two years of skating! Crazy! I have abs now! 😀

"We'll make a dancer out of you yet!"

Tonight's lesson went well! As expected, the one lady who joined us last week for a trial and gave up halfway through never came back. I feel bad. What if taking ballet classes was like a bucket list item for her? Then she gets to our class expecting to learn basics and is thrown to the wolves instead. We had another beginner join us this evening and she, like me, is a true beginner. She clearly looked lost at times but she stuck with it and actually tried. I hope she comes back.

Barrez - Much better at the barre tonight! In fact, I'm starting to feel comfortable enough to focus a bit more on Port de Bras and head position. Bobbie come over and corrected my positions a couple of times and I gladly accepted her help! One correction was on my passé. I should really strive to have my toes almost in front of my knee instead of directly to the side of my knee so it should pass up my leg rather than pass along it. Later, when we were stretching with one leg up on the bar, my standing leg was in first position. Bobbie came and fixed that as well so my toes were facing the bar rather than out to the side. She said she was "saving my knees" and I appreciate that!

Centerz - Lots of glissades and pliés. I was much better at pirouettes this evening as well but I'm still struggling getting my feet back into 4th position once I come out of it. My body always wants to treat this like a spin on ice and keeps wanting me to do more than one revolution. At one point she reminded us to remember our arm positions and as she was talking I must have done something pretty because she yelled "YES! Good girl, Mandi! We'll make a dance out of you yet!" I did a thing! :)

Across the Floorz - I was excited about the waltz step combo because I've been watching videos and  practicing so I think I got it! I may not make a fool of myself after all! I partnered up with a more experienced dancer so we could go across together and then I could just watch him if I needed to. But I discovered that I didn't need to watch him! Yay! I got the steps! So, it's a waltz step, balancé, pirouette combo and for the first time, I felt like I could really listen to the music and move my arms accordingly with my steps and even make it more musical. I struggled with returning to 4th position coming out of the pirouettes but hey, it happened!

Grand Finalez - She had the class mark some new steps that I think she might incorporate into our next class. I would describe them but again, it was mostly in french. The other students seemed to pick it up quickly and I'm just over on the side hopping around trying to make sense of it all.

Overall, I feel like I'm making progress and I didn't feel as lost tonight as I have in previous classes. I think I might be getting the hang this whole ballet thing!

Attention

In all of the research I've done on the ballet world before I started, I remember reading that if the instructor singles you out in class and corrects you that that's actually a good thing! That means she's noticing you and cares enough about your dancing to make corrections. So, when Bobbie made corrections to my posture, toe point, and arms, I graciously accepted it! I felt honored even!

Last week, I came home from my lesson and was feeling pretty defeated. I got no corrections and I felt like I was just bumbling about with no direction. I decided that I was going to be better this week for my lesson so I watched a ton of videos on YouTube and figured out how to do that waltz step across the floor and I practiced my pirouettes so they wouldn't be so flaily. I was ready to start today's lesson with a bit more knowledge and skill in my ballet arsenal.

Before we began at the barre, we were introduced to an older lady who was there for a trial. She is a ballet noob like me so I instantly felt like there was one other kindred spirit struggling through this class with me.

Barrez - Progress! I was so much better at the barre today! I still had to have a more experienced dancer switch with me so she was always in the front but I was surprised that I was able to look away from her at moments to focus on port de bras and where my head was looking. I also somehow chose one of the barres that didn't have an additional lower barre on it so when it was time to do leg stretches, I really had to stretch since my leg was higher up on the bar. But it felt good. I was finally able to keep up with everyone during barre and I feel like a boss!

Centerz - This involved arabesques, tendus, and pirouettes. Although I was much better than last week, my technique is still garbage. Bobbie came over to correct my posture. I have excellent posture but it's just not ballet posture! The way she positioned me made me feel like I was about to tip forward. It felt wrong but she assured me it was right. She also made some corrections to my turnout (or what little turnout I have). Finally, she stopped the class so she could ask me about my pliés. Since I have plates and screws in my left ankle, it's really difficult for me to get a proper bend in the knee/ankle on that side so when I do a plié, it's a bit lopsided. She understands that my injury is preventing me from demonstrating proper form but she attempted to fix me anyway. I appreciate that. Finally, I realized that going on relevé without a barre handy is a sure fire way to die. How is it so easy for me to balance on a thin blade on ice but I can't relevé to save my life?

Across the Floorz - Here I am thinking we were going to do that same waltz step we did last week! Silly me! We did, in fact, do a waltz step but this new version included pirouettes and step behinds and once again, I was lost. So much for studying. I'm so bad at picking up on choreography! Ugh. So now I need to find another video tutorial for this waltz step! (Fast forward to my lesson on ice with Christopher and I'm telling him about this new waltz step and he's all like "Oh this?" and he does it...perfectly...ON ICE!)

Overall, this week felt better than last but I'm still skeptical about this class. The instructor is lovely and I like the studio facilities and the people in the office. However, I will once again lament that I'm out of my element. This class is not only intimating for beginners like me but I feel like I'm not getting a good enough foundation on the basics because I'm being made to do more advanced moves before I even have a handle on the simple concepts. That poor lady that was there for the trial was so lost that, at one point, she just stood in the back and watched. I think she would have left if she didn't feel it would be rude. I would be surprised if I see her again next week. I think she was scared off and if she doesn't return, I understand. I have two more classes that are prepaid and then I will make a decision about whether or not to continue at this studio. I really want to learn but I can't learn anything if I'm in a constant state of ineptitude.

"You're out of your element, Donnie"

Wow, ballet is HARD! Like, duh, right? I mean, I knew it would be difficult but I'm really struggling. I think the major problem is that, even though I'm enrolled in a "beginner adult ballet" class, I'm the only beginner. I feel like I'm the only one who can't keep up and that's because I am the only one who can't keep up! There are ladies in this class who have clearly been doing this a long time. In fact, I was speaking with one of my classmates and she told me that she has been in this class for four years! No wonder everyone knows what they're doing! Also, there are teenagers in this class dropping in and they very obviously have been doing this their whole lives. After class, a good portion of the "adults" stick around for the pointe class. Beginners don't do pointe! Why am I in a class with dancers who are trained enough to be able to do pointe work???

I guess I thought I would be in a true beginner class where they teach you the different positions and how to plié and stuff with basic (and slow) counts. Instead, I'm in a class with adult ballerinas who apparently know french and can perform the complicated steps the instructor is giving us. I feel like I've been thrown to the wolves. To use a skating analogy, it feels like I'm an Adult Basic 1 level skater who has been thrown into a Freestyle 4 class and am somehow expected to keep up.

I'm worried that since I'm just looking at the other dancers and trying to copy them so I don't look foolish, I'm not really learning proper technique (or anything at all really). I'm here to learn how to do things properly, not just how to keep up with the others. Anyway, I have three more prepaid sessions and I'll see where I'm at then. Everyone in the class is so very supportive, encouraging, and kind and they keep promising me that I'll get the hang of it. But is this really what an "adult beginner" class is supposed to be like? I really love this and want to do well but I feel like I'm being set up for failure.

Ok, I guess I should talk about what we worked on. We warmed up at the barre for a good while and at least this felt easier than last time. Again, I had to watch the girl in front of me because I still don't know all of these french terms but I wasn't as lost as last time. Then we moved to the center to work on glissades, arabesques with turns, and a waltz step thing that we did diagonally across the floor two-by-two. It was the waltz step that terrified me the most because I felt so exposed. At least during the class people are so busy looking at themselves in the mirror that they don't notice me flailing in the back doing all the wrong steps. But now I have to go through the center with all eyes on me? Anxiety ensues! One of the girls saw me struggling and offered to go through the center with me and, while we awaited our turn, she gave me a quick lesson on the steps. Super thankful for her! When I finally got the hang of it she gushed about how proud she was of me! I felt like a puppy who finally understood what "sit" meant and she was about to give me a treat for a job well done.

How am I just expected to pick up on all of these steps on my second class? I'm trying to practice at home but if I don't know the steps in class how can I take what I've "learned" home with me to practice? I'm feeling super discouraged that I won't be capable of doing this after all. I feel like I'm most certainly out of my element.

First Class!

As the days and hours approached for my first ballet class, I grew increasingly nervous. Like, sick to my stomach nervous. I got to LBA a good 45 minutes before class began and then I sat in my car for a while debating whether or not I should actually go in. I texted with my husband for a bit and he pep talked me enough to get out of my car and go inside. If it wasn't for him, I might still be sitting there.

I entered and immediately made my way to the office to let them know I was there for the trial. The lady I spoke with over email recognized me right away as "Christopher's student from the rink." I hope their expectations are low. Even though I'm Christopher's student, that doesn't mean I'm going to be any kind of graceful! I'm here to learn how to be graceful. It's not my default setting.

She had me fill out some paperwork and then gave me a brief tour of the place. The place is big with many studios (my class will be in Studio 2) but I was disappointed to learn that, besides the two-stall bathroom, there isn't a changing room. So, I either need to change at work before I head down to Littleton or change in one of the bathroom stalls once I get to LBA. I know from experience that trying to get into tight-fitting clothes in a space the size of a closet is difficult! She left me so I could go change and then I sat on one of the couches waiting for the class to start. I thought it was expected that students stretch before class, but when I asked her where the best place to stretch was, she said that stretching will be in the studio as part of the warm-up for class. Ok then.

There were two other adults there for the trial, a mother and daughter duo. The daughter has danced before and was just returning after a few years off and her mother was like me, a complete beginner. However, I think she's a bit ahead of me in terms of ballet knowledge from watching her daughter dance for so many years so she's at least familiar with the basic terms and how classes are run.

7:00pm arrived and we were all called into the studio. Me being me, I tripped on the way in. So graceful! The studio floor is raised about an inch or so and there is a ramp leading into the room. I didn't see the ramp and just walked right in and immediately to the left and tripped on the elevated floor. Awesome first impression! The 3 new adults were introduced to the class. I was introduced as "the ice skater from the Promanade" and when the instructor mentioned Christopher's name, the girl in front of me turned around and said "He's your coach? Wow, he's great! I've danced with him here before!" So, everyone knows my coach and, because of that, I'm even more nervous that their expectations of me will be high. Now I feel like I need to do really well or I will damage his reputation. No pressure at all.

After introductions, we got started at the barre. I really wish I could tell you what we did and what I learned but it was mostly in French and everyone seemed to know what do with very little explanation. The lovely girl in front of me was super sweet and switched places with me every time we switched sides so she would always be in front and I could use her as a guide. Without her, I would have been so lost!

In the last 10-15 minutes, once we were all properly sweaty, we put the barres away and did some work in the center. Again, I really wish I could tell you what we did but French happened. I just tried to keep up the best I could. Luckily, the instructor has some background in skating and when she saw that I was struggling with a particular turn, she told me to think of it like a loop jump and somehow that made things click because I was able to do the thing just fine after that.

An hour and 15 minutes later, class was over and I hurt in places I didn't even know existed. I'm not used to sweating! I usually do my exercise in a giant freezer so I'm not used to being damp from sweat and smelling of effort. I made sure to personally thank the instructor and she said "I can tell you are one of Christopher's students! You listen." I mean, I tried my best to keep up, listen, and take corrections so I'm glad she noticed that although I was struggling, I was at least taking things seriously and I really want to learn.

So, I gathered my things and told everyone goodbye and that I'll see them in August when the new academic year starts and they all stared at me in confusion. Apparently, the adult classes just run year round with no regard to an "academic year." So they convinced me to just come back next Monday and they assured me that it would get easier every time I come. Great group of people!

Overall, I loved it and I'm sure I'll love it more once I understand what the heck is going on. Not only do I not understand the physical language of how my body is supposed to move but I so unfamiliar with all of these new terms. And it was so much more difficult than I had anticipated! You watch dancers and they make it look so effortless but each movement takes so much strength, balance, and flexibility. I have a long way to go but I'm excited about this new endeavor. Hopefully someday I will no longer be seen as "Christopher's student" but as Mandi, a dancer in her own right!

Me, the Ballet Noob

First Post! wOOt!

Celebrations aside, welcome to my "beginning adult ballet" blog. I have had an adult figure skating blog for many years and it has really helped me keep track of my progress so I thought I would do the same here!

Ever since I was a little girl, I have dreamed of being a ballerina! Now, that I'm an adult, I finally have the perfect excuse to make it happen. My figure skating coach is also a trained ballet dancer and, on numerous occasions, he has suggested using ballet as a supplement to my on-ice training. I know that taking ballet will help strengthen my core, teach me musicality, and add much needed poise and grace. Most importantly, ballet will keep me flexible and will strengthen my ankles (which is most needed since breaking my left ankle/leg two years ago). It will be good therapy for my body as well as my soul.

So, where will I be going to receive this training? I think I have settled on the Littleton Ballet Academy. They seem pretty adult friendly and my coach highly recommended them. I'm scheduled to go in this coming Monday evening for a trial session before I sign up for the new academic year. I'm pretty nervous about it since I know nothing and feel like I'm going to stand out because of that. However, in my experience with the adult skating community, I know that for the most part the other adults will be supportive and they will be gentle with me (at least I keep telling myself this so I don't have a complete anxious meltdown).

I also bought supplies! I ordered two leos, two pairs of ballet pink tights, two skirts, two pairs of leggings, and will get shoes tomorrow in person at the ballet shop near the Academy. If anything, I may at least look like a dancer.

The title of this blog is "Librarian on Pointe" to match my already existing "Librarian on Ice" blog. Yes, I know it will be years before I graduate to pointe but it's a goal of mine to eventually achieve. Let me dream.

So, yeah, I'm terrified and excited and anxious but I know this is something I should be doing! Welcome to my blog!